To Whoever finds this:To whoever finds this:I do not know who is reading this,And honestly I do not know why..You may think that this is hopelessnessThat you break down and cry.But now that you are reading,Please continue to read moreFor you see that I hold the keyThat can unlock that forceful doorMy name is...Well that does not matterYou do not need to know who I am.For I am a quiet whisper..A wind in times sand.All I want is to help youTo have you come to your releaseSo maybe you can haveSome well deserved peace.
Without a soulHow about we play..A sick little gameThat is use to the maddeningThe quiet insaneI love to feel the silenceThe sick life demiseThe lost and hopeless Look in my victim's eyesShe does not make a soundEven though her mouth is not closedMaybe she will rememberTo never strike that poseI love the look she gives meAs her pain makes her cryShe knows that she is loosingI will make her dieShe never called for helpWhen she watched me take control Now she is locked inside the mirrorA vessil without a soul
I play the fiddle on my armI have a talentDeep inside my poresThe only way to release itIs to cut open the closed doorsOnce the music starts playingIt can not stopTime stands stillBecause of the broken clockThe scarlet red notesPlay its sad songIts a melody to my earsI know it wont last longI am lost here in my wonderlandAs the music feels my soulA sad crimson melodyAs the lost of notes takes it toleI do not wish for quietI do not wish for peaceAll I want is the songThe music's sweet releaseThe drum is getting softerIts silence is comepleteMaybe I can rest nowAnd finally get some sleep
.....my feelings....I want to sleepIn my blood covered sheetAs my world goes blackNow and thenTime was my friendUntil my world came downI just want the endMaybe its stupidMaybe its dumbThat I want to dieBut the pain makes me numbMy razor blade is my angelIt shines in the lightAnd lets the real meCome back to life..I think that its funnyThat I am going insaneBut now my parents wont worryI enjoy the painMy mother wont hate meAnd wont make me feelThat in this hopelessnessHer love wasnt realMy stepdad wont be botheredWith his good for nothing step daughterAs with her razor bladeShe joins the slaughterIts really a
Please, Dear God...Please...Dear God,I am so scared...I want it to end.My heart is shatteringI am going insaneI have not eatten In three days.Worry fill my mindAnd fears steal my heart.I am going crazy...I feel guilt,I feel stressed.I will not disobey any moreI want to take the test.I will listen now..And I will do my best..Please do not let my mom be madLet her not scream or shout.My soul feels hollowMy body feels empty..I want to run away..I am 18 and I know that I couldBut God, I am scaredI am scared of herI am scared that she will hate meI know that I do not make her proudNothing I do can make it better
In that one moment."Well, I guess this is it..."You use to say...The false hope..To send demons away.."But you run from the light.Choosing the night instead.A dark reminder...You wish you were dead.."You look at my body..As I am against the wall..Blood soaked clothes,Could tell no lies at allYou stand there just lookingAt my sad little demise..Wishing you had feelingIn those uncaring eyesThe gun lays beside meBeside the broken coreThat no longer has a heartbeatThe corpse is toreThe barrel is still hotThe bullet is in my headFor it was just a few minutesBefore you found me deadYou sit beside meAnd try to figure o
Endless Tears of Sorrow and PainI stare at the mirrorAt my light green eyes..As they change from that colorTo my dark grey lies..My mother calls my nameAnd I just smileSometimes I wish she would careJust for awhile...My arms are coveredWith a fine white clothNext comes the long sleeve shirtAnd a jacket I never take offMy body hurts But no one will seeMy dying green eyes..That change to my gray lies..No...Its not what you think..Its just my feelings..In this crimson and clear inkTears mix with bloodTo create this fantisyAs my paper flowers surround This cold dying meMy endless tears are mixingWith times endless sandSorrow a
Fighting to....I am fighting...To keep my sanity...To keep my "Friends"But God knows......I am loosing it...I did it again.And this time I didnt careThe blood rushes out..And all I can think aboutIs typing this...Oh well...No one will noticeThe red ink that poursOut of my veins Through open doorsThe teachers wont noticeThe look in my eyesAs I look at my "friend"And say my goodbyesMaybe its stupidAnd maybe its dumbBut with this painI can go numbIt helps me relaxAnd helps me become freeTo get away from the liesAnd become the true me..
TAKE THIS HEARTTake this heart That beats in my chestCut it out deepSo it can have restTake this heartAnd stitch it togetherIts tired of the painOf the emotional weatherIts tired of the foolish liesAnd the hollow smilesIts tired of the soft criesAs my soul walks for milesSo please..Take this heart..As it slowly diesAnd whisper softlyThose sweet goodbyes.
Blood on the snow and I love you..."What does this remind you of?"I ask you as we sit together,A mix of red and white..."It reminds me of a bunch of feathers"I smile at you sweetlyAnd look into your eyes"It reminds me of blood on the snowand sweet little goodbyes"You shake your head and laughIf only you had known...Days have passed and months went byI have not talked to youI wont let you see me cry..Later that night I guess it has beenA gun in my hand, it has to end..A few seconds later, you come crashing in.To a moonlight white room, stained with blood red sin.."What does this remind you of?..." I asked with a painted smile..."A simple wh
Do you know what I wish for?...I wish that you would see meFor what I really am..That you would not forsake meAnd destroy me like a dam...I wish that you would love meAnd show me that I am trueThat you love me for who I amAnd what I say and do..I really wish...That it would be true...And it wouldnt just be a dreamI wish I had you.
Her Dark Paradise... The girl, the small girl, who sat by the window as the sky flashed its sudden light, looked out into the forest. Animals nor humans dared to enter her domain. With eyes red as blood she looked. Bound to this place by the invisible chains that kept her here. She stood and walked across the barron room. No paintings or artwork showed any life here. In her world everything was dark. She walked down the hall where even demons world run if her shadow approached. Beyond the hallway was a secret door, you could not see it unless you knew it was there. In that room, the girl was created, brought to life by the ma
I am chained by youI am bound to you..I am chained by you..I am stuck hereAlone....I am hurting..On the inside..Can you feel my pain?Do you hear me?As I scream your name...It hurts..These chains dig into meOn the outside and in..Stop pretending...Stop pretending thatyou love me..Stop pretending that you care...Stop with all the lying..I know you will neverbe there...Let me go..Set me free..Unlock these chains..That bound me....
Tired of my shattered heart...I sit in my roomAnd cry for you..I text youAnd say..I miss you...I guess I am selfishI dont mean to beI want you aroundSo I can feel freeYou come around Once in a whileAnd my heart is happyThen...Your gone the next dayAnd my heart shatters..Again and again..Yet I still smile,When you come aroundWhat do I do?To make it feel okayTo smile on the inside...Do I let you go?Do I stay here?Do I cry when you leave...I miss you dear...But I am tired of beingAll alone..For months by myself..My heart shatters...My heart is shatter To the coreI guess it may be timeTo close the door...I loved
Maybe....just....maybe...Maybe...just maybe...The memories will drown...In this crimson rainSo maybe i'll find comfortIn this sweet painMaybe...just maybe...I can be normal..And not have to hideTry to be formalMaybe..just maybe...You can smile for meAnd I wont have to pretendI'm not the thing you seeMaybe..just maybe...I can let goSo you can be happyAnd I can stopliving this life of woeMaybe...just maybe..I wont be so sad..I wont be so tiredI wont turn mad..Maybe...just maybe..You can stop meFrom going insane..Stop me from cuttingFrom craving the pain..Maybe just maybeI could make you smileAnd laugh...Maybe.
Here I am...Here I am..Bloody and brokenBent to your willWords never spoken..Here I am..Locked in this placeForever frozenIn times endless spaceHere I am..With this fake smilePainted and plastered Its what I am now..Here I am..Empty and hollowFor all that once wasThe future will followHere I am..Watching the sunFor all that will beCan never be doneHere I am..Smiling on the outsideCrying on the inWhy do you thinkThis is a sin?Here I am..This is meThere is no one eles...I would rather be.
Missing you...I dont know why..I feel this wayAs time goes byThe seasons change..I cant help it but...I miss you...Its kinda scary..To think like that..But...I miss you..Does it scare you?...It scares me..To put my faith in someone..To just talk to them..I'm scared..But...I miss you...I need to stop.I need to act okay.So then you wont freak outAnd never talk to me againBut..I guess...I will just..Keep on going..And smiling..but....I keep on..missing..you...I miss you...
To keep going?....Do you not hear it?The broken heart that fallsShattered to the ground..Do you not see it?The tears that pourWith the crimson riverThat drowns her soul..Do you not feel it?The hurt that you caused..The pain in her mind..The lost that she feels..Do you not hear it?The quiet cries of her mind..The voice behind her eyes..She calls your name..Do you not see it?The whimpering pain..Ths scars on her arms.As she goes insane..Do you care?She tells you she loves youShe tells you she caresShe loves to help youSo you know she is thereShe puts on her smileAnd acts like she is okayWhile it is hard to keep
When you're gone...Do you not hear it?The hurt behind my laugh...You come around every once in awhile...But we stay on this continuous path..You call me just when..My love starts to fall..And then I am back,At the start of it allI am addicted to this feelingThat plays in my head..The one time you call me..As I lay in my bed..You tell me that you love meThat this is not a dream..We sleep with the phone on.To be close to eachother...But now your gone again..You disappeared..And I am here to pick upThe pieces of my heart..I smile in this empty houseAnd wait for you to come backBecause with all this madnessLoyality...
My life is a sketchbook and poemsMy sketchbook is my diary...It holds all the strings...I writing is my lifeThat holds together with ringsMy empty pages are the chaptersThat I have no yet reached..I here just to tell you..I do not like to preachMy poems are my memories..Though some I try to ignore...Its hard to keep on movingWhen its painful to lock the doorMy sketchbook is my diary...Its white pages sing to meIt helps me with my prombleTo find who I can be.
Burning...Burns...It burns me....And yet I like the pain...The chemicals that hurt me..Keep me from going insane...The fire is my poison...I'm the only one to blame...The fire is my passion...One that I can not ignore...This pain that I'm feeling...It's burning to my core...I do not feel its warmth,And I do not feel its shame..All I feel is sweet silence,And this remarkable pain..Burning is my problem..One that I can not ignore..Fill my room with gasoline..Start the burning once more.The fire is all around me..I hear my parents scream,"Our son is inside!!"They must wish this was a dream..I wonder what they
Loosing humanity...They must have warn me...About a thousand times...And yet I had to see them..One final time..I had seen them kill others...Infect others...I use to run from them..But I have hope...no more...I let them take over me...I hear their soft moans ring in my earsTheir bites infect me...I'm on the verge of tears...I lay there bleeding...Theres no point in fighting...I guess my friends face that fact..Because now they're running...From this undead zombie pack..I can hear the little whispers...Deep inside my head...They are calling my name...As I become undead...I am loosing my humanity...All I want is blood.
We are falling.........I dont want to admit it....But maybe once I do...Everything will be okay...Ya I know that your leaving...And I know you dont want anything to do with me...Its just a one time talk then gone...We've been falling for all this time...And I have nothing left to give...I always end up bloody and broken...All I want is to live...But we have been falling...And I am tired...I dont want to hurt..I dont want to feel the pain...I swear....I love you...Really I do...But...We are falling...And all I want is peace...To hit the ground...And end in sweet release...
To be forgotten is worse than deathCan you imagine it?...To be sitting alone in a crowed roomNo one speaks to youNo one says your name..You're there..But imaginary..You're an item in the backgroundA tool to be used...You are forgotten..Not dead..But you wish you wereIts how you feel in your head..Imagine this...Your all alone..People talk and laugh..But you'll never have a homeYour forgotten...No one remembers you...No one cares when you get upAnd quietly walk away..You are forgotten...You are lost..You are no one.....What is the cost?What would you pay?To finally be seen..What would you pay?...To be redeemed...Would you
Sta.sh
